She got her 4 year old hair extensions
It’s a moment many moms of little girls dread, walking in on the self haircut. It’s almost a rite of passage that little girls take scissors to their hair. Usually a piece or two falls victim to the scissors, but what happens when it’s much much worse?
I’ve seen it happen to a few moms of girls I know. Usually there are many tears shed at the beautiful locks on the floor and then there’s an impromptu trip to get a quick hair cut to even out the damage. Sometimes the little girls end up with a bob, sometimes shorter hair. And eventually it grows back.
But, a member of our community, when faced with her daughter’s self beauty shop disaster, took a different approach. She decided to get her four year old hair extensions. You can see pictures of the before and after here.
In her own words, she hasn’t gotten the best reaction, "She had them in a couple hours and I already getting backlash."
Reaction in our community to her decision to use hair extensions instead of a short hair cut has also been negative. The general feeling seems to be that a lesson was lost when the little girl instantly got new long hair, that the focus on long hair was misplaced and that the cost and possible damage to the hair are not worth whatever positive feelings long hair may bring.
If I’m going to be perfectly honest, I have to admit this brings up very conflicted feelings in me. I wonder how we got to a point where we place that much emphasis on a little girl’s appearance. I’m not blaming her mom because I can understand seeing the butchered hair and wanting desperately to fix it. But why in our society is that much emotion is attached to simple locks of hair?
How do you feel about the hair extension solution to a little girl’s bad self hair cut? What would you do in that situation?
Eh. I wouldn have spent the money, but I don care that someone else did. I don think it a big deal either way.
As for missing out on the natural consequence of short hair, you can say the same thing about the moms who try to salvage a self cut by going to the hair dresser to get a cute as possible
wholesale wigs short cut. If you not going to make your kid suffer through ugly butchered hair (which I think is an excessive punishment and humiliating for a young child) then you defeating the natural consequence as well.
I wouldn do it. Like the people on that
wholesale hair thread, I expect my child to handle the consequences. I hope my daughter won do this; she has gorgeous hair in beautiful tight curls that are nearly to her waist when her hair is wet. (Granted she 2 1/2, so that not actually all that long!) Because it can be hard to take care of, I might keep it shorter than mine (which is well past my waist and almost sit down on able) while I the primary caretaker of it, but I hope it will always be long enough for pigtails. And if she chops off a few locks of it at some point, a corkscrew or two sticking straight out would probably be cute too until it long enough for a barette or to get back into the pigtail! If I have to get her a halo type haircut, I will.
But like I said, I hope she won do it.
I think the people on that thread went a little too wild with it, continuing the argument beyond all reason and nitpicking silly things that aren really germane. If I were the OP I have checked out of the conversation after the first page or two, and not continued the argument. I hope I have done so if I were one of the responders too. People were getting way too het up about it.
I also known mom who really don doll themselves (because they just not girly girls and they don really care for fashion, etc up but they have little girls who dress up better than mommy and likes to look in the mirror more than mommy does. Where was that behavior learned.
My main point is that the little girl cut her hair and mom got her extensions. That was the perogative of the mother as if a little girl did something wrong, the mom talked to her instead of sending her to time out. It was just a different way of handling it. If moms up here get so up in arms about issues like discipline and how it truly up to the parents on how to discipline their child; then shouldn the same go for this situation? Why should she have to succumb to making her child have a short hair cut so that she could learn her lesson because that what other mothers have done? This is just how she handled the situation. All the other mothers putting emphasis on the whole aren you adding your own values into the equation?
When my daughter was 5 she cut her beautiful, long, blonde hair. She left herself with a long mullet.
Yes, I took her to the salon and had them it. I was not going to let her have a shaggy mullet. She was given a layered bob. The stylist had to cut layers into her hair in an attempt to disguise the butcher job that she did on her own. Would I have considered extensions? No way. Not worth the expense when the hair will grow back. My daughter is no 11 and has never given herself a haircut since However, a couple of years ago she asked for a shorter cut so she could donate to Locks of Love.
When I read this blog and the comments, I really didn have much of an opinion beyond a quick shrug. Then, I read the actual thread, and here is what irked me:
1)The mom and her daughter equate short hair with boys only or being unattractive.
2)Furthermore, the mother thought her kid self esteem would be damaged (permanently?) if she had a haircut she didn like. Wow! If your kid self esteem is that fragile, heaven help you when she is a teenager.
3)The mom thought she could post something like this on a public forum board and not get negative feedback. Where has she been? Here on BBC, people want to burn you at the stake for anything and everything they disagree with. Certainly, she didn think people would write, did the right thing. comment >
I completely agree with 22, Jessika. For me, the lesson missed was not cut your hair short! It doesn grow back in a day! The lesson missed was, are a beautiful child. You don need fake parts and lots of money to keep you that way. far as the little girl being so upset, her mom mentioned that as a child she, herself, was mortified to have a haircut and cried as it took years to grow out and get her back. I can help but think a little encouragement from mom might helped this situation
facebook besthairbuy and the girl took cues from her mortified parent. Yes, this idea of femininity is so prevalent in our society today, but things are progressing. Femininity is much deeper than the length of your hair, and minor changes in your appearance like a haircut shouldn be cause for tears. Although, this is coming from a woman with short hair who has not only survived it but feels just as beautiful and feminine as when I had long hair! Call me a rebel.
This whole situation begs WHYYYYY??? Anyone who read the thread would understand the mother projected her own insecurities and self image issues on her tiny, innocent daughter. The mother had the problem with her daughter less than perfect appearance with hair, while the child simply cried in apprehension and fear of punishment. It is a shame that someone who has posted in vehement defense of anorexia is now forcing her own warped concepts of beauty and worth on her baby, rather than seeking the help she herself so desperately needs (by her own admission she has quit therapy because she doesn like it.)
It irks me that she is gaining more attention and even more traffic to her personal blog through this extension of pleading for her when what she really needs is a cold, rude awakening to the reality that she made this an issue and a problem to begin with.
My neices chopped their hair two summers ago. The first time the oldest did it, she did it to her bangs and it was actually a really good job(we didn tell her that!) But a few weeks later both cut their hair. Badly. They ended up with short bobs and they cried because 1. They ended up with boyish hair and they wanted long hair like mine and 2. Because they were in trouble.
I think getting hair extentions as my first reaction to that knowledge was smart but then agree , the lesson was lost of your own hair, you get to wait for it to grow back and next time if you want it cut we will do it right wouldn backlash this mother, but I not congradulating her on teaching her daughter that long can be back in a short time. With money.
I can believe all of the judgmental comments up here on this board for someone who did something different from what is the of a punishment. And for all you HYPOCRITES who are saying that the mom is pushing her own self imposed vanity on her little girl are YOU to say that she did? Do you know? Did you talk to her? Were you there when she made that decision? Did you know if the little girl was alright with what she did before her mom found out? IF you have ZERO answers for this question, then WHY in God name are you jumping down her throat for doing something like this?
Are you sure the lesson is lost? Seriously, some of you people up here make me shake my head. You actually directing your own and thoughts of vanity on the mom and the little girl. This was how she handled the situation, in a way that she thought would benefit her daughter, and some of you, because it wasn what you did, are hanging her for it what? Because you think she is soooo worried about looks? So what? What wrong with wanting long hair? For either the mom or the daughter? It their personal decision. And just because she posted it doesn mean that she should get torn limb from limb for it.
Well, again, like other posters have said: if you even FIX the air (cutting it short) then the whole lesson is kind of a moot point, because YOU STILL FIXED IT one way or another.